I've just read Fifty Shades of Grey – now what?

• If you're feeling aroused after reading the book and ready to heat up your bedroom, or just play a different part in your relationship read on. We've got five steamy suggestions on how to live out your own Fifty Shades of Grey. Cable ties not needed, this is the luxury way to do it.

• Surrender Date

  If the “surrender” is not saying steamy to you then just think about reinventing date night with your partner. Get him to pick a night and let him choose everything, he makes plans for dinner and doesn't tell you where it is (which means he also has to book the babysitter if needed), he gets to pick your clothes, lingerie and tells you how to wear your hair (I'm crossing my fingers your partner doesn't send you out in tacky red lingerie, school girl skirt, knee high socks and ponytails). He then gets to pick what you eat for dinner, basically your partner gets to make every decision. Letting go of the fact you don't have to think for a night is the idea of bliss for most women. Just think, when you get into bed that night, your head might not be swimming with thoughts like “I forgot to put the laundry on” or “I must remember to take the DVD back”, it might just be buzzing on the beauty of your partner and the love you feel for him. It can be very exhilarating to surrender your control.

• Adventure in the name of Arousal

  Cover your eyes. This is an easy one anyone can try at home, using whatever you've got on hand. Ties work well as do head bands, silk blindfolds even better, smelly old socks not so good. With your eyes covered let your partner caress your body, focus on their touch, what it feels like, what it makes your body feel like, anticipate what they'll do next. Encourage your partner to touch, kiss, blow, caress with a scarf or even better paint edible body chocolate - anything unexpected which will force you to pay attention to your body. And if you have a partner who is not so good on the creativity front, do it to them first to get their imagination flowing. Think of it as an exercise in emptying your mind and focussing on your bodies. What happens next is up to you.

• Tie Me Up

  No, you don't need to use cable ties, as Christian did in Fifty Shades, when just about every designer pleasure maker has satin cuffs or ties, some even padded for your delicate wrists. Well ladies you don't need to be uncomfortable, in fact you can feel uber luxurious in some silk ties. Use something soft on your skin, such a scarf around each wrist and add that blindfold following the methods above. Really want to experiment? Have your partner tie your feet apart as well so you are shaped like a starfish and then carry out the moves above.

• It's playtime

  Women around the world are looking for Fifty Shades of Grey sex toys, in particular Ben Wa balls. These balls can be worn any time of day and they have dual benefits of giving pleasure and strengthening your pelvic floor. Some women wear them around the house and find unexpected pleasure from unpacking the dishwasher (who knew?), whilst others wear them grocery shopping to alleviate the monotony...so that explains why some women look blissful whilst putting a 10kg bag of kitty litter in their trolley....

• Talk

  We're not talking about the cliched “oh baby you're soooo big”, but it's time for you to verbalise what you want your partner to do. Have a little fantasy in the back of your mind, but too timid to broach the subject? Bring it up, talk about it, talk about what moves turn you on (and no it can't be your partner doing the cleaning, cooking the dinner, grocery shopping etc!), we're talking booty moves. If you carried out any of the exercises above were there things you noticed about your body, that really made it stand up and pay attention? TELL HIM!

• Next Up: Everything you ever wanted to know about sex toys but were too embarrassed to ask

  How you ever wondered “what's that used for” or had to Google "magic wand" just to see if it did wash the dishes?

See also:

• Everything you ever wanted to know about sex toys but were too embarrassed to ask